Family, life, Pain

Thoughts from Throwing my Back Out

About 10 days ago I threw my back out and have been largely immobile since. OK well maybe that’s a stretch as I have been able to get around, but very slowly and painfully. Accepting this injury was difficult at first. I had trouble coming to terms that this could happen to a young, 36-year-old guy! Of course, when I was around 8 years old I chipped a huge chunk of my permanent front tooth in a skateboarding incident and asked my dad, “Why me?” I guess I still haven’t grown up.

But I eventually did face it head on, my lower back issue. The pain of lower back spasms, at the intensity I was having them, surprised me. At times it was excruciating and in regards to sleep, forget about it. I will say, behind the complaining and disbelief, is a yearning to get moving again.

I miss walking normally, without pain. I miss picking up my kids. I miss helping Nikki bring the groceries in. I miss taking the trash out. And boy do I miss working out. When I am able to return to my daily activities, I will certainly have a renewed appreciation for just the opportunity and privilege to move around freely, expressing myself. But for now, I am choosing my situation and making the most out of it, learning as much as I can.

Despite my old man woes, I was still able to hobble around the kitchen in the mornings to fix Nikki’s coffee. We wouldn’t want to find out what might happen if she had to start a day without caffeine.

The lesson for me is next time on a run, when the dissatisfaction creeps in that my pace is slower than I think it should be that day, or whatever, I will smile and look around at nature, and enjoy the actual movement of running and the fact that I get to run for another day.

Be well,



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